The Doggie I Asked For……

The Doggie I Asked For……
I asked for strength that I might rear him perfectly;
I was given weakness that I might feed him more treats.
I asked for good health that I might rest easy; I was given a "special needs" dog that I might know nurturing.
I asked for an obedient dog that I might feel proud; I was given stubbornness that I might feel humble.
I asked for compliance that I might feel masterful; I was given a clown that I might laugh.
I asked for a companion that I might not feel lonely; I was given a best friend that I would feel loved.
I got nothing I asked for, But everything that I needed.

Author Unknown

Sunday, June 5, 2011

The Chipmunk Chronicles

It's easy to determine when Spring has officially sprung because our backyard becomes a frenzy of activity - somewhat akin to grammar school Disney World vacationers on sugar and crack, but these are little striped furry characters.  To visualize more easily, bear in mind that chipmunks do everything at 200 MPH.  Racing along fallen tree limbs, leaping over rocks, scampering beneath the Mt. Laurel bushes churning up dead leaves and literally creating enough noise to sound like the entire Soprano mob crashing through the New Jersey woods fleeing from FBI agents.
Chipmunks also love holes, hundreds of holes -- these holes connect to a tunnel network that would shame the Viet Cong. They pop up in one hole, zoom across a parcel of grass, and then dive into a different hole.  Sometimes all this dashing, digging and diving is for necessity because the hounds (our dachshunds) are on the run, but sometimes it's just for the joy of it.  They always look like they're having a blast, like Annette and Frankie playing Beach Blanket Bingo which they've changed to Hole Hopping in the CT hardwoods.
This live entertainment is provided daily, all day, weather-permitting and as long as sunflower seeds are strategically placed for the viewing pleasure of the seed provider, moi.  I pile the seeds inside and outside the fenced area, being certain they're in sight of me and the hounds (for chasing/exercise).  Then I sit on the deck swing and think about the "Cops" theme song ===  Bad boy, bad boy, whatcha gonna do?  Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?  because the hounds will definitely be coming for them.  There are early morning, matinee and evening performances and there are multiple stages located on the east, south and west sides of the yard, with the deck being on the north side and therefore only used as an absolute last resort to escape capture by squeezing their chubby furry bodies under the bottom stair or through the lattice-work on the side.  Sometimes the chipmunks ('munks) work in pairs for a split second before one of them does the math and attacks the marauding other 'munk, tumbling ass-over-teakettle all over the area, trying to dislodge seeds from stuffed cheeks.  And as Larry the Cable guy would say "Now I don't care who you are, that's funny!"... This one clinging to the tree in the photo below was about to pounce on the one filling up at the fast food statue basket....

Now, after all the rainy days, the 'munk cache of supplies was depleted and lots more inventory was needed to be hauled in for the heat wave days predicted.  There's less scurrying and scavenging when the heat and humidity are high so gathering is in full swing during these nice breezy days.  Cheeks are loaded to maximum gross weight capacity and traffic to/from their underground dens and hidey-holes is only equaled by the bumper-to-bumper Long Island Expressway on a Friday afternoon out of New York City.  But all of this hustle & bustle has a downside - not enough focus on Dora the Determined's Speed-Traps, hiding at the fast food joints and rest areas, below.....

Ordinarily the afternoon 'munk rush-hour is timed to coincide with the hounds' PM deck nap but this one supply-excursion the other day was not up to usual Seal Team Six standards.  While Dora Lee was positioned as planned, the 'munk scout spotted a huge pile of seeds by one of the large rock formations near a further tree.  The 'munk cruised below radar through the underground Midtown Tunnel, popping up just inches from the tennis-ball playing Rudy, careened off Rudy's rear-end and blindly barreled in the opposite direction smacking right into a sleeping Solly!  The nearby Dora Lee spun on a dime, Solly jumped a foot off the ground, Charlie flew off the deck as back-up, and Rudy discarded the tennis ball to join the "10-13 -- Sleeping wiener dog startled" call-to-arms!  A wild, howling barking yipping chase ensued around the area where the suspect had been last sighted.  But alas, the 'munk had slipped through the fence and out of their jurisdiction.....*sigh*

Solly decided to seek the comforts and safety of his indoor sofa and all puppers personnel returned to the deck HQ for a cool drink of water & a second PM nap.
The Furry "5-0" would reconnoitre and rehash pursuit tactics for another day....
Chipmunks - 1
Hounds       - 0


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